THE SOCIALIZATION

It happened again.  I was sitting with a group of strangers making small talk.  It was going well. There was a woman (besides me) who was dominating the conversation, but that is ok because it provides material for the rest of us.  Suddenly, someone asked me about school and I confessed to home schooling.

Dominatrix looked me right in the eyes and said with a smirk, "I taught school for 20 years".  Then she stared at me (this is exactly how it happens every time); as if I were going to say "Well, I think teaching is a waste of time and you are an idiot for wasting your life like that". (Which is not what I believe by the way).   I said nothing.  So she started asking me about the socialization, while my kids were playing with the other kids at the party near by (and crying because someone spoke directly at them and did not wash their hands first).  (That last part was a joke).

Then my daughter, a normal, ok above average looking, tweenager in lederhosen (again I am kidding about that part) approached the table.  The woman looked at her and asked, "Do you like home schooling?"  To which my daughter replied, "most of the time" while spelling out "Please contact the authorities" with napkins.

Then for the rest of the conversation I was under suspicion.

I wonder if this would happen in any other context.

"We're Christians".

"OH YEAH?  WELL I HAVE BEEN AN ATHEIST FOR 20 years!  What about the open mindedness?"

"We're vegetarians"

"OH YEAH?  Well I have been a butcher for 20 years!  What about the protein?"

"We're democrats"

"OH YEAH?  Well I have been a republican for 20 years!  What about the environment?"

"We're musicians"

"OH YEAH?  Well I have been tone deaf for 20 years!  What about the socialization?"

I think the next time someone says "I HAVE BEEN A TEACHER FOR 20 YEARS" I will beat them to it and say "what about the socialization?"  Maybe they can explain themselves to ME next time.  I love teachers.  I loved my teachers and some of best friends are teachers (and some of my best teachers are friends...HI JANE!)  In fact, my parents were teachers and my Dad worked for the Ohio Education Association.  (Hi Dad!)  I have nothing at all against teachers.  I have nothing at all against public school (except maybe what time it starts).  I just like home schooling and my kids want to do it. 

Maybe next time someone asks me about the socialization I will just snap back "are you calling my kid a nerd?" 

What exactly is "THE SOCIALIZATION" anyway?  Is this a secret society that I am so out of touch with I don't even know exists?  Maybe "THE SOCIALIZATION" is the club you join to be thin, rich and popular.  Maybe "THE SOCIALIZATION" is like the homeowner's association and there is a pool somewhere we aren't swimming in.  Maybe I AM cheating my kids out of "THE SOCIALIZATION".  I will have to investigate this further.

In the meantime, be warned - if you don't know me, and you decide to publicly challenge how I raise my kids, or quiz them about my parenting, I won't like talking to you and I will blog about you even if it gets me black listed from "THE SOCIALIZATION".

For the record, the 'SOCIALIZATION' appears to encourage anti-social habits like openly criticizing other parents for exercising their right to educate as they see fit. But far be it from me to point that out...

Comments

[Frisch's Big Boy]

Brilliant! I am sad to admit this is true. I am also sad to admit there are homeschoolers whose habits may inspire legitimate questions about socialization. We need to educate each other so we recognize the pros and cons of all systems. Public school socialization involves good things, but also has wedgies, drug sales and inappropriate student-teacher relations. Yet, I don't consider the latter, negative issues a way to characterize public school. Likewise, there are home schoolers who learn little or are closed-minded Bible-Bangers or who have the social skills of dry ice, but then there are others, like Jill's kids. Jill you do a great job, and no one can take that away from you. Respectfully submitted by Frisch's Big Boy - a publicly schooled, home-schooling Dad with a genius wife.

[Dana]

I am totally a first time reader and a homeschooler. This made me laugh really hard and then even HARDER when you brought up the vegetarians and protien because i AM a vegetarian and THAT IS SO WHAT PEOPLE SAY--right after they ask me what my kids will do if we ever let them out in public. Oh and since i used to BE a public school teacher, we are considering entering the Former Teacher's protection Program. There will be liederhosen. Thanks for the laugh.