This is ridiculous stuff to have on my mind. It's my matter. All my matter that does not really matter is driving me out of my mind. My matter is over my mind. It is over my floor. It is all over the place. I wonder how I am ever going to beat this stuff. (I have less than 2 weeks to do it in!)
I don't really care about big stuff that cost a lot. I can let go of that. I care about toys and books and clothes mostly. I have LITERALLY had to tell myself, "You are not getting rid of a 3 year old girl. You are getting rid of a cheap piece of cloth made without love by a team of under paid workers. The adorable 3 year old girl you remember in these clothes is now 10 and you can enjoy her inner 3 year old anytime you want. In fact, I bet there are pictures somewhere of that dress on that girl, but you are too busy fussing with this stupid rag to enjoy the pictures or the girl". That helps. I can't get rid of toys easily because I don't know if one child's trash will be another one of my children's treasures. I would hate to throw away some potential favorite. (This is sick, I know). Books are hard too for the same reason.
My husband is a stuff addict too. He won't confess it, so I am confessing it for him. He hoards things like shampoos from hotels and free chemicals from the transfer station. Things that will save us a dime later. He saves articles to read and sentimental things and medicine among other things.
This is not helpful. It is bad enough that I am fighting myself to get rid of things; but having his stuff attack me too is really tough. It is as if I am battling with myself all day not to over eat and I actually succeed in resisting, only to have someone pry my mouth open and put high calorie food in while I sleep.
I'm sure there are people reading this who will know instantly what is wrong with us. I am sure there is a name for it and a reason for it and a chemical imbalance causing it. Oprah does shows on this topic, though I don't think we are that bad - but we could be. It's easy to downplay your stuff. Frankly, I just think like so much else in life, we are just too busy to stop and notice it, let alone deal with it. Who wants to think about stuff? Until it is time to move...then you are forced to think about ALL your stuff and do something with it by a strict deadline.
Speaking of deadlines: I recently told a friend that I was ready to write a book on hoarding stuff. The title is: SO LET GO OF IT ALREADY, DAMN-IT It is 3 chapters long. In fact, it is 3 pages long. In fact it is 3 sentences long. So here it is:
Chapter 1 Keeping your stuff does not keep you or your stuff from getting old.
Chapter 2 Keeping your stuff does not keep you from dying and being forgotten.
Chapter 3 Nobody wants your stuff, they have too much of their own stuff to deal with.
Maybe that is harsh and cynical and morbid. It may not even be true. So here is my rebuttal of the book I wrote. It is called: Hold on a Minute, That's Not Entirely True: It is also 3 chapters long.
1. "People do TOO, want your old stuff!" I actually REALLY love some of the stuff other people have given me that they did not want. I have a huge table and hutch that I adore (Thank you, First Wife)!
2. "Your stuff does TOO keep you from getting old!" I probably have been kept "young" by having reminders of my childhood around (including the house we moved to when I was 6, still containing my parents and my stuff!) I still want the stuff I had when I was a kid and I love to visit it and show it to my kids.
3. "Keeping stuff does TOO keep you from dying, sort of.." I love the stuff I have that was my Grandma's (even dumb stuff). When it breaks I feel sad that another part of her is leaving me. I am a sentimental fool.
So I guess you have to take stuff in moderation. The stuff I am talking about having to get rid of is just stuff and it's been stuffed in my garage and closets and collected dust which stuffed up my kid's noses. It's not lovable stuff it is menacing, unruly stuff. Keeping it in line is a nightmare. Therefore this old stuff does not get to come with us to our new house because it is yesterday's stuff. We have to make room for the stuff of tomorrow...that is the stuff dreams are made of.